Nice guy Gareth Southgate ‘total filth in the bedroom’, alleges former lover
He’s the most successful England manager in 55 years, the man almost single-handedly uniting the…
NotN
Elon Musk to buy Persian cat and live in hollowed-out volcano
The world’s richest man and new owner of Twitter, Elon Musk, has announced his latest…
Man who thought his Chinese wife was Japanese, in charge of UK economy
A man who once referred to his wife as being Japanese, even though she is…
Man in his 50s losing ongoing battle with nasal hair
A 51 year old man from Newport Pagnell has confirmed that he is losing his…
‘Are we getting an extra Bank Holiday?’, asks Britain
Following the sad news this week of the passing of Her Royal Highness Queen Elizabeth…
Chelsea sack Graham Potter
News of the News understands that the London-based club has sacked its new manager, Graham…
Conservative Party members face difficult decision of choosing between man with brown skin and lying simpleton
With the number of candidates vying to be the next leader of the Conservative Party…
F**k me it’s hot, says Britain
For once, the much-divided people of Britain have a genuine reason to unite as temperatures…
Larry the Downing Street cat secretly hoping Kurt Zouma becomes next PM
Whilst the Tory party chooses our next Prime Minister, spare a thought for Larry the…
Tory Party members to decide who gets to f**k you next
In a demonstration of democracy at its finest, the 200,000 or so members of the…