April 24, 2024

New Coronavirus vaccine has 99% effectiveness but needs to be stored in treacle on the moon

There was further positive news today with reports of a vaccine that has a 99% success rate in tests conducted so far.

NEWS of the NEWS understands that the vaccine could be available to the public in early 2021 and that, whilst a number of countries are considering placing orders, it’s very specific storage requirements are delaying take-up.

A spokesman for the manufacturer of the vaccine told our reporters:

“We are very excited to have a product which is pretty much ready to go. We do appreciate concerns regarding the storage requirements of the vaccine but feel that these are massively outweighed by its effectiveness. And anyway, treacle is readily available from most supermarkets plus lunar travel is within reach for many if not all developed nations.”