October 18, 2021

Matt Hancock “sniffed own fingers” in COBRA meeting says source

In what has been a tumultuous week for Health Secretary, Matt Hancock, further revelations have begun to emerge from sources close to him during the Spring 2020 lockdown.

A senior government official, who spoke to us on the condition of anonymity, told NEWS of the NEWS that Mr Hancock was often seen “sniffing his fingers and grinning smugly” whilst others discussed how best to tackle the pandemic.

The source told us that at the time most attendees figured the Health Secretary’s actions were “a reflection of his limited mental ability” but, with hindsight, now realise that they were more likely to have been a nauseating post-tryst act by the schoolboy-like Hancock.

The government has so far refused to comment on these less than savoury revelations.